I dont ride up front on the Powell line cable cars anymore. They crowd people on the step and youve got people between your legs and in your face.
Nah, I'll pass. :)
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Ready for the cable car ride.
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Monday, March 27, 2006
It's not you, it's me.
Today's horrorscope
Already on it.
By the end of this year, I should be living a different life than I am now.
Over the last few years, Ive been holding back on doing the things I want to do. Now Im done holding back.
Things are coming together.
I should trust the process more than I do, but fear is inevitable if you have any sense.
-----------
While living in Berkeley, I met many folk who I respect and admire. That theyve made mistakes in their lives is undeniable, and theyre struggling to regain what theyve lost is not a sure thing.
Ive learned a lot from them - one being this: "Work on yourself before you work on your problems." Most definitely.
One of the wonders of growing older and gaining experience is the realization of how much you dont know and how much you didnt know previously. Far from being frustrating, it's an indication of growth, although I will look back and think "Jeez, how ignorant was I?".
And thats just yesterday. :)
------------
One of the more painful things is to consciously shed people you care for. Thats not an easy decision and not an easy thing to do if youre doing it from love. Basically, I have to love myself more.
I'll say this as an explanation for those who think they might be one of those people: its not about you, it's me.
If Im angry at you, thats my issue. If I have to seperate from your orbit, its because I need to feel better about myself. You are who you are. If I cannot handle it, that's me. Not you.
An ex once said that I avoid conflict. She saw this as a sign of weakness. Actually, I avoid conflict because ... I like to fight. As another once said in surprise after knowing me for 4 years, "You are no teddy bear, are you."
Nope. I have claws.
So, if someone makes me angry, the best thing I can do is to get away from them.
I just dont like being around people who piss me off. I get away from them.
Dont mistake my detachment for not caring.
-----------
Today's horrorscope
Everything in your life can change. Today, figure out which things are going to.
Develop your abilities to adapt and improvise, and you'll be able to face the future fearlessly. Once you accept that change and fluctuation are a part of your life, you'll be able to make great strides forward.
Already on it.
By the end of this year, I should be living a different life than I am now.
Over the last few years, Ive been holding back on doing the things I want to do. Now Im done holding back.
Things are coming together.
I should trust the process more than I do, but fear is inevitable if you have any sense.
-----------
While living in Berkeley, I met many folk who I respect and admire. That theyve made mistakes in their lives is undeniable, and theyre struggling to regain what theyve lost is not a sure thing.
Ive learned a lot from them - one being this: "Work on yourself before you work on your problems." Most definitely.
One of the wonders of growing older and gaining experience is the realization of how much you dont know and how much you didnt know previously. Far from being frustrating, it's an indication of growth, although I will look back and think "Jeez, how ignorant was I?".
And thats just yesterday. :)
------------
One of the more painful things is to consciously shed people you care for. Thats not an easy decision and not an easy thing to do if youre doing it from love. Basically, I have to love myself more.
I'll say this as an explanation for those who think they might be one of those people: its not about you, it's me.
If Im angry at you, thats my issue. If I have to seperate from your orbit, its because I need to feel better about myself. You are who you are. If I cannot handle it, that's me. Not you.
An ex once said that I avoid conflict. She saw this as a sign of weakness. Actually, I avoid conflict because ... I like to fight. As another once said in surprise after knowing me for 4 years, "You are no teddy bear, are you."
Nope. I have claws.
So, if someone makes me angry, the best thing I can do is to get away from them.
I just dont like being around people who piss me off. I get away from them.
Dont mistake my detachment for not caring.
-----------
Due diligence using jedi mind tricks
After work yesterday, i wandered over to ye olde camera store to fondle, err - examine the next camera purchase.
First impressions were good, the feel was good, controls I can decipher etc etc. nothing to change my mind. A good dsLR to start off with.
I was happy. Next paycheck, the camera would be mine.
Until, the salesgirl started talking about lenses. Thats when the shock & pain started.
For a hundred bux more, I get the kit lens. For 400 bux more, the kit lens that comes with the Nikon D70. For 750 bux, the nice all in one lens that is sold with the Nikon D200. The nice one. The one everyone can use. Which is sold out everywhere.
By the time she was finished talking about lenses, BASIC lenses at that - we were talking about 1400 bux extra.
And the really, really nice lens, the one I really want to start off with is 2 grand.
urgh.
The dilemma is - do i get cheaper lenses I can afford and deal with inferior images, which is NOT the reason Im making the move to more expensive gear - or suck it up and buy good stuff and eat ramen for a year?
Well, i am one persistent bugger - so I know there are ways of getting around this short of hacking into a bank (armed robbery is so passe).
It's a commitment and investment, so i better man up and bleed money. :)
After work yesterday, i wandered over to ye olde camera store to fondle, err - examine the next camera purchase.First impressions were good, the feel was good, controls I can decipher etc etc. nothing to change my mind. A good dsLR to start off with.
I was happy. Next paycheck, the camera would be mine.
Until, the salesgirl started talking about lenses. Thats when the shock & pain started.
For a hundred bux more, I get the kit lens. For 400 bux more, the kit lens that comes with the Nikon D70. For 750 bux, the nice all in one lens that is sold with the Nikon D200. The nice one. The one everyone can use. Which is sold out everywhere.
By the time she was finished talking about lenses, BASIC lenses at that - we were talking about 1400 bux extra.
And the really, really nice lens, the one I really want to start off with is 2 grand.
urgh.
The dilemma is - do i get cheaper lenses I can afford and deal with inferior images, which is NOT the reason Im making the move to more expensive gear - or suck it up and buy good stuff and eat ramen for a year?
Well, i am one persistent bugger - so I know there are ways of getting around this short of hacking into a bank (armed robbery is so passe).
It's a commitment and investment, so i better man up and bleed money. :)
From "10" magazine
Halle Berry for versace
As Digital Underground's Shock G put it
"Vanessa Williams. Oooh.. I just wanted to put you into my rhyme.."
Ooh, Halle... :)
Sunday, March 26, 2006
Bad patient
I suspected there was an ulterior reason for my knee to blow, and sure nuff i found out why.
It was to finally get my ass to the doctor.
See, unless there is something seriously wrong, there is no way in HAIL I ever hie thee over to the medical industrial complex.
I may act like a big baby when Im sick, (the secret Virgoan hypochondria *cough*), but I actually have a high tolerance for real pain.
So, this was not trivial.
Here is the trippy part. I hobble from work to bus to the ER for them to look at my knee. The ER nurse checks my vitals and informs scolds me that my blood pressure is off the scale. (My boss wryly noted i shouldnt have been reaming her a new one before going to the hospital, but hey - Im not shy when folk irritate me with silly shytte.)
So, Dr Mei (way cool doctor) was far more interested in my high blood pressure and diabetic condition than my inflamed knee, which had - almost miraculously - gone way down in size in the short distance between the ER and the clinic.
She confirmed it by the ER nurse's notes which read "acute pain, swollen knee" and noted that pain was largely gone and had deflated down to normal size (comparing it with my other knee). In one block and a 10 minute wait to see the doc. I am not kidding. I thought I was gonna need surgery on the thing.
So, Im now fasting before a blood test in the morrow, which I would never have gone for the pain of my now 80 percent better traiterous knee.
Weirdly, I was happy for this when I left the medical industrial campus complex. Probably because my knee was getting better and I didnt need surgery...
It's all in how you look at it.
I suspected there was an ulterior reason for my knee to blow, and sure nuff i found out why.
It was to finally get my ass to the doctor.
See, unless there is something seriously wrong, there is no way in HAIL I ever hie thee over to the medical industrial complex.
I may act like a big baby when Im sick, (the secret Virgoan hypochondria *cough*), but I actually have a high tolerance for real pain.
So, this was not trivial.
Here is the trippy part. I hobble from work to bus to the ER for them to look at my knee. The ER nurse checks my vitals and
So, Dr Mei (way cool doctor) was far more interested in my high blood pressure and diabetic condition than my inflamed knee, which had - almost miraculously - gone way down in size in the short distance between the ER and the clinic.
She confirmed it by the ER nurse's notes which read "acute pain, swollen knee" and noted that pain was largely gone and had deflated down to normal size (comparing it with my other knee). In one block and a 10 minute wait to see the doc. I am not kidding. I thought I was gonna need surgery on the thing.
So, Im now fasting before a blood test in the morrow, which I would never have gone for the pain of my now 80 percent better traiterous knee.
Weirdly, I was happy for this when I left the medical industrial campus complex. Probably because my knee was getting better and I didnt need surgery...
It's all in how you look at it.
Saturday, March 25, 2006
tV maKes you StUPID
It was the high volume of the informercial that woke me up made me do something I almost never do. Turn off the TV.
I almost never turn off the TV, even when i leave the house. Hey, I dont pay for the electricity and I got the TV for free off craigslist.
I plopped back in bed, and had a dream I almost never have anymore. A nice dream thats a built-in novel. Not as smoothly constructed as they used to be, but definitely an improvement.
After that deep sleep, I awoke to the realization: TV has been making me stupid.
Lately, Ive been finding myself trying to remember words, losing my train of thought in a conversation very easily, my attention span miniscule.
I'd thought it was a consequence of being 40 and not eating salad.
But no.. its been the constant bombardment of TV. It has damaged my brain. My lord.
No wonder I dont write anymore, or answer emails.
During the day, I turned the TV on to catch the Duetsche and BBC channels. I ended up watching Kim Possible. I laughed and turned it off, sat down to enjoy my newfound clarity of mind and purpose .. and nothing.
I was stupid again, feeling as if i was in a torpor. (God, words like torpor Id forgotten.)
Then I realized i needed a nap to reset my mind. And a few hours later, it did.
So, am I going to give up teevee? No.
But, it'll be off when its time to go to sleep.
It was the high volume of the informercial that woke me up made me do something I almost never do. Turn off the TV.
I almost never turn off the TV, even when i leave the house. Hey, I dont pay for the electricity and I got the TV for free off craigslist.
I plopped back in bed, and had a dream I almost never have anymore. A nice dream thats a built-in novel. Not as smoothly constructed as they used to be, but definitely an improvement.
After that deep sleep, I awoke to the realization: TV has been making me stupid.
Lately, Ive been finding myself trying to remember words, losing my train of thought in a conversation very easily, my attention span miniscule.
I'd thought it was a consequence of being 40 and not eating salad.
But no.. its been the constant bombardment of TV. It has damaged my brain. My lord.
No wonder I dont write anymore, or answer emails.
During the day, I turned the TV on to catch the Duetsche and BBC channels. I ended up watching Kim Possible. I laughed and turned it off, sat down to enjoy my newfound clarity of mind and purpose .. and nothing.
I was stupid again, feeling as if i was in a torpor. (God, words like torpor Id forgotten.)
Then I realized i needed a nap to reset my mind. And a few hours later, it did.
So, am I going to give up teevee? No.
But, it'll be off when its time to go to sleep.
Friday, March 24, 2006
DVD release
Stalag 17, the movie based on the real life memoirs of WWII POW's that inspired Hogan's Heroes.
This is a movie I saw at a young age and still remember to this day. Didnt even know it had won an Oscar.
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Blow me down.
Well, I'll be. Im gonna get a Nikon D50, Ive decided. Sooner than later, even.
Color me surprised at this.
I'm surprised for this camera was such a long shot, I had thrown it into the mix only because .. shit, no.. it had no chance. A crippled, built for cost consumer class dSLR? No.
But even cursory research shot the camera ahead of the pack. Far ahead of the pack. For image quality, it gives up little to its higher-priced bretheren the D70/D100, and based on the images Ive seen on flickr, it betters them in some respects.
Image quality. Thats big with me.
And it seems to be built up to Nikon quality, plus there is the availability of years of Nikon lenses out there. (I will be browsing flea markets and craigslist.)
Add that it can be had brand new for less than 500 bux, and it's owners wax rhapsodic over it, that eclipses my deal breaker about it - it only takes small, expensive SD cards.
Wow.
Based on how fast the prices are dropping, this thing is seriously under-rated. By people like me, apparently.
Next step, I'll be fondling the demo at the local camera store. Due diligence, natch.
Well, I'll be. Im gonna get a Nikon D50, Ive decided. Sooner than later, even.
Color me surprised at this.
I'm surprised for this camera was such a long shot, I had thrown it into the mix only because .. shit, no.. it had no chance. A crippled, built for cost consumer class dSLR? No.
But even cursory research shot the camera ahead of the pack. Far ahead of the pack. For image quality, it gives up little to its higher-priced bretheren the D70/D100, and based on the images Ive seen on flickr, it betters them in some respects.
Image quality. Thats big with me.
And it seems to be built up to Nikon quality, plus there is the availability of years of Nikon lenses out there. (I will be browsing flea markets and craigslist.)
Add that it can be had brand new for less than 500 bux, and it's owners wax rhapsodic over it, that eclipses my deal breaker about it - it only takes small, expensive SD cards.
Wow.
Based on how fast the prices are dropping, this thing is seriously under-rated. By people like me, apparently.
Next step, I'll be fondling the demo at the local camera store. Due diligence, natch.
a
For no apparent cause or reason, eh.
For no apparent reason, I woke up this weekend with my bad knee so swollen and inflamed I couldnt stand.
I dont remember twisting it, landing on it badly or abusing it. I woke up, it was like that. The pain was excruciating. I hobbled to work but took a cab back home. It was throbbing so badly, I couldnt bear the thought of taking a bus.
Since then ive been housebound, resting the knee and feeling like an invalid, ordering in food because I couldnt walk one block.
I dont like the feeling.
It's a lot better now, still hurts, but i can at least rest some weight on the knee.
For no apparent reason.
Yup, sounds like merc retrograde in effect.
The flip side of merc retro, a period of change, is also in effect - subtle, but very strong.
Amazing the changes in less than a month.
For no apparent reason, I woke up this weekend with my bad knee so swollen and inflamed I couldnt stand.
I dont remember twisting it, landing on it badly or abusing it. I woke up, it was like that. The pain was excruciating. I hobbled to work but took a cab back home. It was throbbing so badly, I couldnt bear the thought of taking a bus.
Since then ive been housebound, resting the knee and feeling like an invalid, ordering in food because I couldnt walk one block.
I dont like the feeling.
It's a lot better now, still hurts, but i can at least rest some weight on the knee.
For no apparent reason.
Yup, sounds like merc retrograde in effect.
The flip side of merc retro, a period of change, is also in effect - subtle, but very strong.
Amazing the changes in less than a month.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Monday, March 20, 2006
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Friday, March 17, 2006
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
On rotation:
-----
Today's horroscope:
Growing older, I find Im getting comfy with things that would bother, disturb, disgust and even frighten me.
Change, fer instance.
This afternoon, i found myself wandering the tony Pacific Heights shopping district and going into places i would never normally go.
Furniture and design stores. Expensive ones.
Not sure why. I told msyelf I wanted some ideas, but then i realized what I was doing.
Im implementing changes. Drastic ones.
Mercury retrograde is in effect, and Ive found that its a perfect time to shift gears and make changes.
In truth, i started making these changes last year, but I didnt appreciate that the changes were a lot deeper than they appeared.
Now, I want to totally redo my living spaces to reflect much more than my practical ethos.
I want MY style.
-------------
One of the good things of getting older, is that you know yourself, and you get to the point where you want your external matches your inner.
Still, I dont think I realized that at some point - you have to throw out a lot, get rid of .. stuff, to accomodate the style you want.
The style that fits.
JPennant: Changes are afoot.
JPennant: feels good.
misterB: new shoes? ;-)
JPennant: more than that
JPennant: gonna redo my place. totally. throw out everything not fitting the style and function.
JPennant: MY style and function
misterB: hmm, got a new lady in your life?
JPennant: i knew youd ask that. :-)
JPennant: No.
misterB: kekeke, just checking
JPennant: No, this is me
JPennant: of course, im not gonna spend high end money to do it
JPennant: style doesnt have to be expensive
JPennant: in fact, it shouldnt be
JPennant: im even thinking of doing that magazine
JPennant: a magazine for young straight men ,written with the sensibilities of gay men.
JPennant: No, its not GQ :-)
misterB: hehe
Dana Owens - Simply beautiful
Janet Jackson - I Get So Lonely
Goapele - First love
Teena Marie - Ooh La La La
Queen Latifah - U.N.I.T.Y
Gaopele - Closer
-----
Today's horroscope:
You've been looking around your place lately and wondering if it's really where you want to be -- and how you want it to look. If you're not sure, you have options.
You can seek out a realtor, start flipping through the newspaper to find something that's a bit more suited to your tastes, or, on the less radical side, set yourself a budget, grab some color pallets, hit the flea markets and antique marts and create a new home -- right where you are now.
Take your time deciding, though.
Growing older, I find Im getting comfy with things that would bother, disturb, disgust and even frighten me.
Change, fer instance.
This afternoon, i found myself wandering the tony Pacific Heights shopping district and going into places i would never normally go.
Furniture and design stores. Expensive ones.
Not sure why. I told msyelf I wanted some ideas, but then i realized what I was doing.
Im implementing changes. Drastic ones.
Mercury retrograde is in effect, and Ive found that its a perfect time to shift gears and make changes.
In truth, i started making these changes last year, but I didnt appreciate that the changes were a lot deeper than they appeared.
Now, I want to totally redo my living spaces to reflect much more than my practical ethos.
I want MY style.
-------------
One of the good things of getting older, is that you know yourself, and you get to the point where you want your external matches your inner.
Still, I dont think I realized that at some point - you have to throw out a lot, get rid of .. stuff, to accomodate the style you want.
The style that fits.
JPennant: Changes are afoot.
JPennant: feels good.
misterB: new shoes? ;-)
JPennant: more than that
JPennant: gonna redo my place. totally. throw out everything not fitting the style and function.
JPennant: MY style and function
misterB: hmm, got a new lady in your life?
JPennant: i knew youd ask that. :-)
JPennant: No.
misterB: kekeke, just checking
JPennant: No, this is me
JPennant: of course, im not gonna spend high end money to do it
JPennant: style doesnt have to be expensive
JPennant: in fact, it shouldnt be
JPennant: im even thinking of doing that magazine
JPennant: a magazine for young straight men ,written with the sensibilities of gay men.
JPennant: No, its not GQ :-)
misterB: hehe
Bank of America building
For being the tallest building in Frisco, few people know the building on sight.
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
Destiny has her hand on my back, and she's *pushing*!
- The Tick
Today's horrorscope:
In addition to being good at your job -- very good, or you wouldn't be doing it -- you also pride yourself at being an expert at your hobby. Regardless of what it is, from sewing to photography to an artistic way with words, you should know that you're plenty good enough at it to make some part-time cash, and that earning from what you love doesn't lessen its value. In fact, it increases it. Don't pass up any chance now to share your skills -- and maybe do a bit of teaching while you're at it.
Okay, okay awready.
Out with friend Risa
Out with friend Risa
Enjoying my favorite 'secret' lookout point. Clear, stunning views for miles.
Where? No, then the tourists will start coming. This is for the natives.
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