Thursday, December 20, 2007
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
All of a sudden, it's tomorrow
Whenever I get asked if Im a professional photographer, I always hem and haw about it, and never say that I am.
I always wonderd why I would do that. I'd always thought it was because I didnt feel like I was yet a Pro, but now I realize the real reason. I dont WANT to be a Professional Photographer. Or more accurately, I dont want to make a living as a Pro. Never have.
Being a professional photographer is a hard way to make a living, not that far above trying to be a professional writer and that is far harder.
Today, Ive started feeling good about what Im trying do, because I am doing exactly what I want to do, inspired by Gordon Ramsey. In fact, it was watching his "Kitchen Nightmares" series that really crystallized my feelings.
And with that, Im happy and have started on what Ive wanted to do for the past 15 years. Actually happy, inspite of being short of money. But that's temporary. I only feel scared if Im not doing something.
I always wonderd why I would do that. I'd always thought it was because I didnt feel like I was yet a Pro, but now I realize the real reason. I dont WANT to be a Professional Photographer. Or more accurately, I dont want to make a living as a Pro. Never have.
Being a professional photographer is a hard way to make a living, not that far above trying to be a professional writer and that is far harder.
Today, Ive started feeling good about what Im trying do, because I am doing exactly what I want to do, inspired by Gordon Ramsey. In fact, it was watching his "Kitchen Nightmares" series that really crystallized my feelings.
His practical demonstration of his principles of passion, high standards and fundamental business principles have really inspired me.
And with that, Im happy and have started on what Ive wanted to do for the past 15 years. Actually happy, inspite of being short of money. But that's temporary. I only feel scared if Im not doing something.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Requim for a Mac
About 2 -3 months after I got it, this Powerbook died.
Except for my old PowerComputing Mac, every Mac Ive personally owned has died on me - this one simply refused to boot. It is one of the reasons I dont belong to the Cult of Mac.
I can fix it, but Im not motivated to do that because A) As a tech, I consider computers disposable, B) Laptops are a BITCH to work on once you get past memory upgrades C) There are 3 possible things wrong with it and one of them costs more than the thing is worth, D) It's time to buy a new Mac. I need an Intel Mac.
I do miss it tho, because Lord, the thing is pretty. Simply gorgeous.
However, when it died and I picked up a near brand-new PC for a HUNDRED BUX off Craigslist, my productivity went through the roof. I simply struggled to process the massive amount of images I shoot with it. Not because it was slow, but because the tools available for the Mac are simply inefficient. Trust me, Im not ill-informed.
There is not one Mac based photographer I know who doesnt have a PC in the corner.
So, as nice as this machine is - it is better off dead.
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Friday, December 14, 2007
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Today's horrorscope sez:
At the same time, Im shifting my direction irrevocably - come hell or high waters.
Heh, I keep saying that.
You're getting passionate. Passion is the difference between doing a job and being a professional. Passion is the difference between liking someone and claiming someone.I hope so. I havent done much shooting since Thanksgiving, been pretty much a hermit.
At the same time, Im shifting my direction irrevocably - come hell or high waters.
Heh, I keep saying that.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Monday, December 10, 2007
Sunday, December 09, 2007
Saturday, December 08, 2007
Today's horrorscope sez:
"Lovers are like apples. After going through a lot of bad apples, when you find a good apple - you treasure it."
Must sound amazing in Italian. :)
Love releases life, gives it breathing room and a dance floor. Find reasons to love, even though there have been disappointments and downfalls along the way.Just read an interview with Fabio, and Im paraphrasing here:
"Lovers are like apples. After going through a lot of bad apples, when you find a good apple - you treasure it."
Must sound amazing in Italian. :)
Friday, December 07, 2007
midnight shopping
As a kid, this was a rare commodity in Jamaica - so i would love it when mom brought me a box of Bugles from the US. A great treat.
I ate part of this bag. I have a splitting headache now.
Some stuff is best left in the past.
Thursday, December 06, 2007
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Monday, December 03, 2007
Public service ad
When you get an AIDS test, also get tested for STD's.
(Wisdom imparted to me by a SF sex worker.)
This week's horrorscope zez:
It may seem to the world at large that you are not doing much at the moment but on an inner level you are plotting and planning and getting ready to make your big move. The only danger is that the planning stage will drift on indefinitely, so draw up a schedule and make sure you keep to it.
Sunday, December 02, 2007
Saturday, December 01, 2007
Friday, November 30, 2007
"To succeed, you MUST have passion."I tend to look to things I find relevant for inspiration and direction.
Recently, I've become fascinated by Gordon Ramsay, the Chef and Businessman. When I started watching his TV shows, I wasnt fascinated by his earthy language or all the restaurants he has. In each and every instance, he insisted on high standards - and never wavered. In his world, excellence is basic.
"Discipline yourself. Become hard on yourself."That is what caught my attention.
The more I watch him, the more I see and he is giving me insights Ive been looking for these past few years on the hows of success.
It might be food and restaurants, but food is basic and business is basic. And, oh yeah - the restaurant business is one of the toughest, most competitive and ruthless businesses there is. Not a bad example to look for inspiration.
" Running your own business is scary. It’s not like going to work for a boss every day: you are the boss and you have to maintain standards. That’s an amazing challenge not once a week or once a month but each and every day that business is open."
Since the year 2000, Ive wanted to leave IT work far behind, as it has become a Golden Noose.
So, Id like to take my passions and make a good living with it - combine Passion with Business - and Im getting the insights Ive been looking for in Ramsay.
“Play on your strengths, and improve your weaknesses.”
--------------
Heh, interestingly - today's horrorscope sez:
It is time to tackle the problems that have been plaguing you. Exploration without purpose will leave you lost in the woods. Be willing to learn from someone who can do a task better than you can.There ya go.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Another Life
I kept looking around for my friend and found her before they hanged her from a tree. I didnt go look but I saw fuzzy pictures of her swinging from the noose on the camera she left behind.
She had killed someone a few years back, she was convicted and the punishment was by hanging, no appeal.
I was trying to find her funeral when I realised something...
She didnt exist. Never did. She had existed as a person in my dream for months now.
What the fuck.
In my waking state, I had no idea. In my dream state, this person was absolutely real. It was only half-asleep this morning did I review and came to the realisation I had been dreaming this double life for months now.
I knew I had been dreaming so intensely for the past year or so that in the transition between dream and reality was indistinguishable. But not to this extent. Even now, in the light of day - I could not give the details of my dreams, but whats troubling is that these dreams have been a continuous narrative of sorts.
So, no - I know no one named Emily who was hanged from a tree.
Weird.
Feels like Ive been delusional.
She had killed someone a few years back, she was convicted and the punishment was by hanging, no appeal.
I was trying to find her funeral when I realised something...
She didnt exist. Never did. She had existed as a person in my dream for months now.
What the fuck.
In my waking state, I had no idea. In my dream state, this person was absolutely real. It was only half-asleep this morning did I review and came to the realisation I had been dreaming this double life for months now.
I knew I had been dreaming so intensely for the past year or so that in the transition between dream and reality was indistinguishable. But not to this extent. Even now, in the light of day - I could not give the details of my dreams, but whats troubling is that these dreams have been a continuous narrative of sorts.
So, no - I know no one named Emily who was hanged from a tree.
Weird.
Feels like Ive been delusional.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
