I heard the call several times..

"Should I answer it?", I asked my advisor - the one who protects me with analysis and reason.

Without emotion, he answered quietly; "It may not be for you."

"It seems like it is.. this time."

"It could be calling for any number of people. It could be calling out to you and many others at the same time."

"Yes."

I eyed his sword, now lightly sheathed, but used with surgical precision and ruthlessness to protect me many times from fools who had carelessly connected to my heart before. It didnt give them another chance to hurt me again.

Those were its orders, and for years it did its job.. often pre-emptively.

It knew what the costs were if it didnt.

But this time, I had asked it to hold on the downward stroke - until it was proven. And in this case, it acted with restraint.

I asked it to, even though I'd been furious and in pain at being a fool. At being called a fool. At being in a long line of fools.

I heard the call again, stronger - after a bit of silence...

"It sounds like its speaking to me..."

"It has spoken to you before.. but then has usually answered your queries with distance, obliqueness, silence and ... untruths. Often when youve answered, you were told the call was for someone else, or no one in particular."

"True."

My advisor wasnt without compassion. He didnt call me a fool. Not like my friends who said it behind my back and to my face when I had trusted the voice, nor when the voice called me one for not listening to unspoken truths.

I had gone on faith then, and this would require another leap of faith.

My advisor heard those thoughts and engaged me in a light game...

"When a cat purrs, is it purring just because it needs you?"

"No, a cat purrs for any number of reasons."

"When a cat meows, do you come running?"

"It may make me wonder, but it may just meow to get attention, or to express discomfort or hunger. Or it may be just meowing for other purposes and to other people.
But no, I try to find out if the meowing is to me, purring for me or trying to get my attention.
Otherwise, I pay it no heed.
As a cat often does things because it is simply being a cat."

My advisor just stared ahead out into the darkness, as I finished "But that does not mean a cat is just a cat."

He nodded, but didnt answer as he gazed out in the darkness. I got his point. He got mine.

We heard the call again.. and could hear its lilted tones against the dark..

"You may want to answer this voice, but the last time you spoke directly to it.. it simply answered 'yes' when you asked it if you were just deluding yourself as to its intentions."

"Yes. And that seemed to be that."

"You have work to do. You have other voices you need to listen out for. It loves many people at once - in the past, now and the future, and may even love you - but it didnt love you enough to talk to you honestly until you started ignoring it. Or even had the courage to tell you what you needed to hear... until you walked away."

"So, is the call for me?"

"It may be, it may not be, but it doesnt matter if the voice isnt talking to you directly."

"So what should I do?"

"Ask the voice if it is really talking to you. If it is true, it will find the time to come close to your ear and answer you honestly and directly.
You should ask for nothing less. You give nothing less, so you deserve nothing less."

"If it doesnt?"

The advisor reached down and touched the hilt of his scimitar lightly, but with purpose, answered simply.."Then I will do my job again."

And with that we both fell silent, as we heard the call again.. both wanting to respond in our own ways.