Berkeley, California
Yesterday, a life was tragically ended before it could fulfill its potential.
In a tragic and senseless accident in Downtown Berkeley, Stella Fuji, lovingly known as "Fuji 4900Z", was fatally injured in a fall when thoroughly drenched in a shower of scalding hot mocha breve with a touch of brown sugar, honey and cinammon.
Duke Dell suffered breaks, mild injuries and a screw loose in the fall. He is expected to recover.
Joe Pennant, Stella's constant companion for the last year, suffered bumps and bruises as he ran for a bus that the driver incorrectly told him he needed to take.
When asked for his reaction to Stella's condition, he replied in an understated manner that he was freaking out, and felt that he needed to immediately maim and kill somebody just out of general principle.
Stella was rushed to a kitchen table where, with the stoic assistance of Mutzu the cat, and blue streaks of cursing filling the air, she was operated on in a grief-stricken attempt to resuscitate her back to life.
Stella leaves no apparent replacement as funds are non-existent.
Cash and donations will be taken in lieu of flowers, cards and condolences.
She WILL be missed, goddammit.
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Berkeley, California
Stella Fuji, unsteady and bit worse for wear is being closely watched for progress after her miraculous recovery from todays tragic, senseless accident where she had been drenched in a scalding hot mocha breve with a touch of brown sugar, honey and cinammon.
"It was bad" said Dr Pennant, also Stella's companion for the last year, "If it was water the damage wouldnt have been so bad, but coffee, especially coffee with brown sugar, half and half, honey and a touch of cinnamon, gets into EVERYTHING. As the coffee penetrated her insides, it thoroughly covered everything, down to the core, as I discovered after I had her bits spread all over the table."
Dr Pennant continued, as he nuzzled the pussy, Mutzu the Cat, who was trying to warm his chronically cold ears by burying his head in the nearest armpit "It was amazing how it covered everything inside. I may have to open her up later and try to get some more coffee out of there."
Stella, apart from a slightly crazed look to her LCD and the strong smell of coffee (as Debbie at Kinko's noted), seems to be back to full health. But she is being rested and watched cautiously for any signs of trauma.
"It made me realize how close to losing Stella I came, especially when Im nowhere near ready to have her replaced. I may even have to panhandle among friends and strangers to raise the cash for this. As much as I love Stella, I need to plan for the future."
Stella's prognosis is guarded and hopeful.
Duke Dell, also injured in the fall, still has a screw loose. He is also under observation.
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