ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBAWWWWLLL!!

My first indication that going to the Oakland Raiders tailgate party would be different was when, as I stepped off the Oakland Coliseum BART platform, a guy thrust into my hand a key ring touting the Bad Boys Bail Bonds. (Their TV ads are hilarious. *Yer momma wants you HOME!* )

Upon hearing I planned to do this photo trip, I was regaled with lurid tales of fights, beatings and heckling from the Raider Nation.

I was kinda lookin forward to that.

Nah. Loud music, much booze, rabid black and silver everywhere - it was a west coast party with fans of all colors and areas rolling in.

As I walked down the ramp, the air was permeated by the aroma of cooking meat, beer and marijuana.

In fact, a group of New York Raider fans who had flown in for the game, faces painted in the tribal silver and black, were kinda agog at the scene.. saying the Jets, Giants and Eagles tailgate parties had NOTHING on this bacchanal.

Seriously tho, they were cool.. reminds me a bit of Chicago Bear fans. Taciturn, blue collar. Hard workin, hard partying.

Upon hearing I had come in from New York

"You a Jets fan?"
"Nah. Bear fan."
"Oh. Good."


Oakland Coliseum























Bill Geist of CBS, there to do a commentary on the raider nation. He looked a bit concerned, probably more puzzled as to how surprisingly friendly the people were. I think he was disappointed there were no fights.

I expected more of the following nonsense..















But really, although loud - it was far more Cali mellow, rowdy friends just hangin out..











"Aright man, just hold it there."
"NAH man, make it natural - just take the picture like I am.. nunna dat posin' shit."

Heh. afterward - he cracked me and the crowd around his truck up with demonstration of all the posin people do...









Shit, I was getting e-mail and phone numbers un-asked.





I was thinkin THIS tailgate party taking place atop the hood of the car was kinda weak, until the guys yelled..

"Man, PUT your hand in there and grab yourself a piece of chicken!!"

So I did.



Thanks guys.

I was being fed without askin all evening.

I was even offered a ticket to get into the game. I declined, but I was touched by the generosity shown me all evening. :-)

Including..

"HEY! WATCHOUT for the horse shit!"



Then when I took pictures of the fresh splatter, there was disbelieving yells of "He took pictures of the doody!!"

This is where the doody came from..





Eventually, I was pointed to the famed Black Hole party central, but I got there after the music and crowds had died down.



























Heheheh.



Yeah, right.

By the time the game started and everyone started filing into the stadium, I would say most of the crowd was LIT UP.





At the entrances, the staff pats everyone down to make sure theyre not carrying booze into the stadium.

The extremely large trash receptacles at each station were being emptied at the rate of every five minutes, as the patrons held on to their liquid refreshments as long as they could.









And then the game started

























Based on the smoke from inside the stadium, I would guess the tailgate parties carried on inside...





I left at halftime, overwhelmed by the sensory overload.



And people were still filing in..
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Oh yeah, the Raider-ettes.. their progress through the parking lot marked by a lotta hoopin and a hollerin.



They were accompanied by a huge police escort, natch.
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I gave Kate the Bad Boy Bailbonds key ring. She loved it. :-)

My Ugly Mug

The pictures to replace my stolen ID card.

S'funny.. Im comparing it to the other pictures I had for that card.

The first as a 15 year old, tired and cranky from the long flight, the picture taken by a Chicago customs official who was trying to improve my mood.

The next, over 15 years later, also tired and cranky, taken by a clerk across the street from the federal building in New York.

And now this one.. more weary than tired, taken by a photo store clerk in downtown Oakland.

Sans the grey hair and beard, with a few more creases around the face, its the same guy.

Imagine all the things he has seen over the years.

State of mind

Him: .. and what pissed me off the *most*, she THEN asked me for a toke, in addition to asking for a place to stay.
Me: She sounds like like a serious pothead.
Him: Heh. That would be half of California. (pause) Dont quote me on that.
Me: Oh no, no (mentally scribbling)

Today's Horrorscope

f you are not yet involved in some kind of group project, then now is the time to sign up. With Mercury, planet of the mind, close to Pluto, planet of transformation, in the friendship sector of your chart, you can achieve great things over the next few days - if you work as part of a team.
This is no time to be a loner.

I know, I know.

But I LIKE being a loner....

Still taking pictures

On my current shoot list

Wildflowers growing out of the cracks of sidewalks in Berkeley. Amazing plants and blooms. Very random.

Bumper Stickers. Berkeley folk like to make statements, hence the plethora of bumper stickers, ranging from "Extinction Kills" to "Excuse me, I must scream now"

"Welcome Aboard" signs by the doors of Oakland's (Alameda County Transit) buses. Ive counted 10 languages so far, from Arabic to Hindi to Korean.

Oakland Raider Tailgate parties. All agree that would be an extreme trip.

People doing Tai Chi in the park.

Yar, its coming along.. although Ive been getting a few shots of cops in action too.

You're in California

Me: Man, I dont know whats gonna happen to me here.
Actress and Ph.d guy: Dont worry.. youre in California. Relax.
Me: Uhhh, I dunno.
Everybody: This is California, its easier for you to survive here.

So far..

Acceptance is the key, apparently.

That its been a trip is a severe understatement...

Yesterday's horrorscope

Because your rising sign is ruled by the moon, your desires go through phases and the phase you are going through now is one in which you are desperate to succeed on the material level.

Yeah, so that I can have a place to live...

Just be careful you don't go making promises that a few days later you might regret.

Uh-oh.

(Yesterday afternoon)
"If we hire you at this ridiculously low wage that wouldnt support a rabbit living in a dumpster, would you stick around for the long term?"

"Uhh, yes. Absolutely."

You should know by now that there is more to life than making money.

Bugger me.

"Smile. It Could be Worse."
* Seen on a panhandlers sign in Berkeley

I cant remember the quote exactly, but I understood it implicitly the moment I heard it.
It was written by a WWII bomber pilot describing how he and his mates dealt with flying into the face of certain death over and over and over.

You get past the point of hysteria, where the tension has stretched beyond the point of screaming, and all that is left is calm..

"..stretched beyond the point of screaming.."
I dont get mad anymore. I dont flip out, scream, throw things or yell.
Sure, my blood pressure goes up, I get stressed, I worry - but mad?

No.

I recognized I had gotten to this state of being somewhere on the cross-country bus ride, after dealing with one thing after another and another.

I think I relished the realization, that I simply had to face everything and just deal.

When I start getting to the point of being mad at someone or something, logic kicks in and I switch the channel to calm down.

Heh. More Jedi mind trix.

Power is indeed within.
---------
The past 3 years have stretched me out past the point of hysteria pretty good as my adult fears have been realized.

When I became an adult:
Didnt want to pursue being a writer, because life in the garret of poverty didnt appeal to me.
Check.
Didnt wanna be a photograper, because that condemns one to a wretched life of toil for little reward.
Check.
Homelessness.
Check.

Abject poverty. Scorn. Toil for no immediate reward.
Check, check, check, check.

No point in getting mad. Ive chosen all this.

So, I hardly get mad.

Successful people have rage inside of them. To be successful you need that inner rage.

Im starting to wonder if being this calm isnt somewhat detrimental.

One needs a bit of rage for motivation, and there are things Im doing that demonstrate Im not doing all that I should for myself.
Because Im being calm, and thinking things will all work out.

Or is it another, deep hurdle within myself that I need to clear to get to the next level?

He told me several times that he didn't like my kind
'Cause I was a bit 2 leisurely
Seems that I was busy doing something close 2 nothing
But different than the day before

- Prince
Raspberry Beret

Ive been told over and over, that Im the lackadaisical sort, unwilling to get moving until the last minute.

Am I the driven sort?
No. Money, sex and fear hardly motivates me, to the frustration of all.

That what *does* motivate me, is it enough?

Is merely dealing enough?

Or am I asking the wrong questions at the wrong time?
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Ive learned more in this past year or two than I have in all the previous five combined.

And yet, I feel as If I have not even begun the apprenticeship.

Heh. Reminds me of what the Sicilian Ladies said to me on the 37th birthday..

"Ach. Youre a young man, still got a long way to go."

Hack the Mac

Lo, those many years ago I got a soft spot for Mac. Not because they were particularly friendly or almighty easy to use - but because its modular nature allowed da geeks to *cough* circumvent Many Many rules and restrictions.

A little creativity and you can get things running on a wing and a prayer.

Or in this case, a zip disk.

Going back to those days of hacking the mac - with the loan of Fred's zip drive, and a bit of trial and error, Ive got the laptop working.

Its booting off a zip disk, bypassing the dead hard drive.

I cant claim that it all works flawlessly, but it works. Ive got connectivity.

At a 100 megs worth of space (technically less than 96.4 megs), aint a whole hell of a lot I can do.. run a browser and my wireless card, eh - but I dont feel as shackled as I did this past week.

A feeling of independence.

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I want, I want, I want

Sometimes, its a whiff, or a glimpse, or a sound.. which will bring on a keen feeling of desire.

For me right now - its the want of a place in a place.

The sight of the funkiness of the Mission in SF, or rolling down Telegraph Avenue through Oakland to Berkeley...

It kinda speaks to me.

I want to be there now. Funds be damned.

But I know how it works - its not all on my timetable.