Monday, April 14, 2003


Comic Crank

This has been weighing heavily on me for several years now, and so Im driven to say what must be said:

Would someone please, with great effort and sweet prejudice, apply a ball-peen hammer to the head of the guy who does the "Garfield" comics so it can be finally brought to an end?

It hasnt generated a laff in donkey years.


Same thing with "Heathcliff" and.. oh lord... "Marmaduke". (I dont think that dude is even TRYING anymore.) Honestly, I'll give money to anyone who has laffed at that strip in the last 10 years or more.

But yeah, Garfield. Used to be HILARIOUS, y'know? It was about a cat, a cat that was smart and cynical, the way we think cats would be if they could talk. Genius.
Now? A gluttonous cat who beats up on spiders, his owner who cant get laid and some dog in there for comic relief?

Oh lord, almost as bad as "Marmaduke" and the weekly interchangeable "pull along the owner on the walk/tipping over cars/bemused neighbors" gags.


These guys, along with the steaming piles like "Mary Worth", "Mark Trail", "Rex Morgan", "Judge Parker" and the like, keep the up and comers from bringing enchantment to what USED to be called the funny papers.

(Although even "Boondocks" is starting to get on my nerves with its snide preachiness..)

There should be an expiration date on some comics. "Beetle Bailey". "Hi and Lois". "Hagar the Horrible." "The Phantom". "Shoe". "Apartment 3-G", "Cathy" et al. No one would miss 'em.

(Judge for yourself.)

Hell, even "Dilbert" is starting to renk up the place.

No one sez the job of a syndicated daily cartoonist is easy but there are auld auld one-trick ponies that still manage to keep 'em rollin in the aisles with sneaky subversiveness. "Tank Mcnamara", "Doonesbury", "Mother Goose and Grimm", "Momma" and the like.

So yeah, "Garfield" guy. Hang it up. The jokes over. Youre rich, nuthin to prove. Go.

Its not like you were doin stuff like "Calvin and Hobbes".

*ache*

I miss Hobbes.


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By the way.. just because I post pictures to pretty up this rag..

It is NOT a photo blog, dammit.

Jeez. I hate when people INSIST on puttin ya into a category....


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