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Ex-AOL'er, boy genius The Kid crax me up.

The rules of retail..

I dunno if anyone reading this has ever worked retail or not, but I'm gonna share with you some do's and don'ts for you to think about next time your in a retail store:

Do LEAVE before the store is trying to close (dont walk in 2 minutes after closing to buy shit, it just pisses off the employs but of course they're not allowed to tell you that.)

Do put shit back where you picked it up from (Dont leave it 2 aisles away on a peg for a different item, or worse right next to it's appropriate spot but under the wrong price point. Employees have to go around and fix that shit before they can leave.)

Don't move signs. (same principle, we have to fix that shit)

Don't Open packages without asking (what the fuck, when I was a kid they'd accuse you of stealing if you opened shit you hadn't paid for. but no, assholes come in every day, open packages, and leave the shit... You open it, buy it. it's just a common sense principle.)

Dont try on shoes or swim fins w/o socks on (this is just unsanitary, I hope some of those idiots catch athletes foot or something from doing that shit)

Dont try on goggles or swim masks in the store. (Now I know it's a pain in the ass to buy and return shit just because it doesn't fit, but the alternative is Pink Eye... just buy the ones you like, clean them, try them on, if they dont fit return them.)

Don't Point guns at sales associates.. (I dont give a fuck if it's a paintball gun thats unloaded, or a soft air bb gun. Common fucking sense, I've knocked 4 bb guns out of peoples hands this week for this shit. They do it even after I say "Dont point it at anyone, especially me.")

Except for the pointing guns at sales clerks and the trying on of swimwear, Ive been guilty of *counts fingers* all of them. :)