"You want some of this cornbread hon?"
"Cornbread? Uh.. sure."
"There's some butter over there you can put on it."

JT's apt complex was having a Chili/SuperBowl cookoff in its club-house.. right off the bar - by the indoor basketball court.

I havent had cornbread in years, never really liked it - but hey this is the South.

"You havent had this in so long? Well honey, youre in the South.. eat up!"

I was dragging some items to JT's storage space, and a guy comes along in a Lincoln Navigator

"Youve got a lot of stuff to drag there?"
"Some."
"Well shit, let me put my stuff up and you can take the truck and get the stuff all in one."

He flipped me the keys and I carted stuff around in a leather lined Navigator.

Schweet.

Hey, give thanks and god will provide.

This is the South, sho nuff.
---------
And to paraphrase Ferris Buehler..

"If you can, drive one. It is CHOICE."

This truck makes me want to get back to driving. Badly.

Whoo.

Sun gave me a reminder as to why Im getting antsy..

NY808: hiking in rain forests was my fave pastime
JPennant: cool :-)
NY808: and itd be only a 20-30 ride to a trail
NY808: here you have to drive hours
JPennant: no you dont
NY808: so where can i find a good trail 20-30 from queens?
NY808: other than central park
JPennant: Palisades. Across the river.
NY808: so much to do here! i just need a hiking buddy
NY808: oh..and time
NY808: damn it
JPennant: yep

I aint going hiking anytime soon, but not being able to go walking is getting to me.

When I first got to New York, my first instinct was to raise my hand and yell "Taxi". City blocks INTIMIDATED me. I even took a cab to go TWO city blocks. More often than I care to admit to.
New Yorkers would look at me as if I were daft.

Now, Id rather walk, if only to the nearest train station.

Even in effing Bayonne, NJ - where you absolutely need a car, eventually Id walk everywhere.

Sturtle writes:

You get to walk in New York--which is, you know, a good thing. In fact, New York is probably the most perambulophilic (I just made that up!) city in the country, maybe the world.

For the rest of Americans, walking is something we do only sporadically--maybe in the middle of the night, we get to walk to the bathroom, or when we want to distribute a memo to our coworkers about the need to practice aiming at the toilet instead of the tissue rack we walk to the copy machine, but otherwise, we hop in our cars, drive the 20 feet to the 7-11, and circle the parking lot for 20 minutes trying to find a spot five feet closer to the door.

But in New York, you wanna get somewhere? Walk outside, two blocks down to the train station, get on, get off, then hike six blocks over, one block up, to visit your friend who lives in a 5th floor walk-up. Life in New York is conducive to great calves and even better asses.

Thats prolly why, Jules - I cant even imagine living in the LA area. Even when I get my license all paid off.

With the announcement of massive layoffs at Amtrak - I think time is running out to take that cross-country train trip.

The three men in the apartment : Joe, JT and Casey the Cat, settling back to watch movies..

JT: Which one?
Me: American Pie
JT: Aight
(15 minutes later, and not a damned thing is funny..)
JT: Planet of the Apes or Charlies Angels?
Me: Charlies Angels. I want to crack a smile at least ONCE tonight.
JT: Supposed to be done over the top with Tongue in cheek. Errr... pun not intended.

Heh. Took me about 5 seconds to visualize and get that one...
-------------------
I stood outside and looked up at the Central Florida night sky.

A man in business casual clothes sailed by on his longboard thru the complex.

I looked up and watched the lights, all the planes circling the Orlando area.

Here, it doesnt feel like everyone is on heightened alert. It doesnt feel like The Blitz like it does in New York.

F'rinstance.. like New York.. all the planes are lit up like Christmas ornaments.. but at least private planes are flying all over.

Small and private planes are excluded from New York airspace..

All you see are commercial planes flying predetermined paths, slowly. Almost no helicopters or private planes, cept for military and civilian authority.

Oh yeah, and the F-16's on patrol.. seen usually when they light their afterburners, making that abrupt turn over Manhattan.

I stood and looked at the lights in the sky.

Normal lights.

Today's horrorscope:

You've planned and pondered long enough:
Now it's time to get your act together and start making your dreams come true. Forget about all the false starts and missed opportunities.
The planets promise that if you believe in yourself and act as if you can't fail, you'll accomplish some amazing things over the next few weeks, starting today.

Holla.

Already making the moves yo.
---------------

Doing a site redesign (for munny)... rockin to the playlist, getting to the creative groove..

DMX - Up in here
NIN - Closer
RedHotChiliPeppers - Love Rollercoaster
Notorious B.I.G - Big Poppa
Digital Underground - Doowatchyoulike
Kool Moe Dee - Wild Wild West
Maxi Priest - Just Wanna Be Close
George Clinton - Atomic Dog
(bowwowwow-yibbiyo-yibbiyay)

and the usual suspects...

Shit. I havent left this house all week. The closest store is frikkin 2 miles away. And its 80 degrees outside. (Heheh. Boohoo)

No wonder I got fat when I moved to Florida.

Heh, better start walkin'.

----------------

Jamie, now an HBO site producer who regularly goes from LA to NY and back writes:

I'm so happy to be home. I feel like I've been gone forever. I think I left town just long enough to miss New York. It's been a while since I've felt like that, maybe since last summer, but more likely since I went to Jamaica two years ago. I don't think I like places where people are happy all the time, and people in Jamaica and LA fucking smile all the time, and then you have to smile back, too, or they think you're an awful person, which I don't mind ordinarily, except I was there on a business trip, so I had to care what people thought about me, or at least pretend like I did.

Anyway, I missed scowling. As soon as the plane hit the ground at JFK, I immediately relaxed my face into my natural scowl, and it felt so good and so right.

Hmm.

Nah.

Someone said, she couldnt imagine me out of NY. Someone else asked if I would be back.

Heh.
---

JPennant: hey
george: Where you at? ;-)
JPennant: couch surfin for a bit at my pals JT's place.
JPennant: a luxury gated community.
JPennant: getting my bearings
JPennant: My body is starting to relax.
JPennant: Now, if I can just figure why the gods have me coming here.
george: To Florida?
JPennant: yeah
JPennant: because in many ways its my disadvantage to be here
george: How so?
JPennant: I dont drive - deadly in a spread out place like this, florida is notoriously difficult to find work in, and there isnt any obvious way I can further my objectives here.
george: Is it warm? Quiet? Can you hear yourself think?
JPennant: yes
JPennant: Is that all I need at this very moment?
george: It may be.

Still, there are things I need to accomplish, and I feel like Im in a holding pattern again...
Today's horrorscope disagrees..

There's such a thing as mind over matter, but it won't help you much today because your physical batteries are at a very low ebb and the only thing that will recharge them is complete rest.
That might be difficult if you've got chores to do and deadlines to meet, but it can be done - and must be done, if you don't want to burn yourself out.

Aight.

I would much rather be in SF, but hey.

JPennant: Heh. Plus I got a cat here givin me all kinds of love. :-)
george: Kitty!
george: Name, make, model?
JPennant: Casey, big coon/tabby mix, 7 years, lap friendly
JPennant: Now sleeping on his back, mouth open, tongue hangin out, legs akimbo :-)
JPennant: I think our heavy petting session wore him out

Aight

"Where ever you go, there you are."

Florida... for the time being.

Ok, now what?
--------------------------

@ the Internet Cafe, while I wait for the train, my bags already checked in ..

Heh. Theyre playing albums straight through now, instead of random muzak.

In the system.. Eryka Badu's "Baduism".

Great album.

-------
Dimitri, the car service driver on ride from Brooklyn to Penn Station this morning...

"I used to live in California.
I moved here from LA. Pasadena. You know where? About 2 months ago.
Yeah, I like New York, the city.. but the people *gaahr*.. cant stand it.

I think everybody should live in New York at least 2 or 3 years out of their lives.

You live here, you can go anywhere else and make it. Because its tough here.

You know what you can do here that you cant do out in California? You cant just pick up and do your own thing. You need to use other peoples money.
Here, I put a little money together, bought this car, got the licenses and Im makin a little money. Out there I gotta work with a big company and use their car.
You need a lot of money to do anything out there.

And out there, you dont have the little shops, the little (bodegas). You gotta go to a mall or a.. a.. 7-11. Not like here where you got these little shops, these little restaurants.

But, I like California."

What he said.
----------------
I feel the love.

I hung out with Tracy and folk and talked late into the night.

I was coddled/mothered/scolded with wine and Vicks vapor rub. :-)

By the time I woke up, I could breathe and I wasnt as stuffed up.

I was having some VERY weird dreams there though...

Heh, it's a small thing, but this is very symbolic of how New Yorkers are..

Me and Tracy rode the train to Atlantic Avenue, where we had different connecting trains...

She had to make a certain train, so she gave me a crushing hug (the best kind) a few words of goodbye and goodluck , and then I watched her sprint off through the tunnels to make her train.

New Yorkers, theyre always rushing off to be somewhere else. :-)

But if they'll make the time for ya.. thas love theyre showing ya.



----------

--- Your Grace wrote:

> Heh. I love this...it looks like the guy is doing
> his best to get up to
> speed on NY lore.

Heheh. Actually, if you go on the subway, everybody
has a book or paper to read.

For some, it keeps them from having to stare at other
people's mugs on the train, and for others its 'quiet'
time to catch up on reading.

So this guy had grabbed the book and flipping to his
place in it...

Im telling ya.. EVERYBODY, it seems, reads here.

> I do, too. Read on the bus, that is. What struck
> me was the blurring of
> the pages, and the relationship to the sign behind
> him, as in "getting up to
> speed"
> Keep em coming, hon.
>
> Love, Poo.

----------------
Smetimes, beforeI leave I'll gaze upon a place, knowing that it's likely that'll be the last time I'll see that scene.

Looking around today.. it doesnt look or feel like the last time.

Hm. This should be interesting.

Random memories..

Havta interrupt this reverie..

Got a train to catch.

Time to go
-----------------

Full speed ahead.

But, as is the wont of the gods, not in the expected direction and not on my timetable. Natch.

My horroscope recently said that something unpleasant would point me in the right direction. So, not to do anything stupid, like fighting the inevitable.

Sure you right.

So, Im blowing the joint sooner than expected, leaving a few ends loose.

No turning back when youve made the decision - and so the story goes.

Not yet packed, sleep deprived, sinuses clogged, still coughing, not in the best of moods.. great start.

Someone point me out the positive outlook I'll need? Thanx.

----------
The most precious thing in this city is finding a place to get some sleep.

Try to find one if you dont have it.

I rode the subways last night, and men, women, young old, black, white were desperately looking for sleep. Uninterrupted sleep.

The internet cafe, they monitor folk and wake you up if you fall asleep in front of the monitor.

Right now, Im hearing a chorus of snores from otherwise well-dressed men.

For a city that prides itself on running 24-7, the most cruel thing is to deprive people of sleep.

And if you dont have it....

No reason, the modo.net ads were thought provoking...






Then they went *poof*.

Fortis Cadere Cedere Non Potest, y'all.

Damned skippy.

Apparently, I am breaking NY municipal law.

Im frequently expectorating * as I deal with NY's latest bug.

Its defining characteristic is a deep continuous cough. Caught it almost as soon as I hit New York. Serves me right.

Now, I gain strength from the hacking smoker's like coughing all around me.

The cough is so endemic and uncontrollable, that people try to bum cigarettes from me several times a day..

"Can I get a cigarette off you, big man?"
"No man.. I dont smoke... *HACK cough cough cough* "
"You dont got any?"
" *cough cough cough.. I. Dont. SMOKE."
(eyes narrowed, with a disbelieving look) "Oh. aright."
*cough cough HACK.. ptui!*

The internet cafe, subways and buses resound with the coughing....

And the *splat* of large loogies.

Hey, Im a responsible citizen. I spit into the rapidly melting snow/ice piles.

* informative link on the wonderful qualities of spit via george

There is a point when you know you need a break from New York.

I THINK I have glimpsed when and why that is.

When you gotta give reasons over and over as to why you like New York... it almost begs for a fresh perspective.

Liking New York is not a religion. New York aint a religion.

It is an expression of sublime energy, in ways large and small.

But...

I need a fresh...no, a slightly different..perspective.

If only for awhile.

It's time.

-------------
Speaking of slightly different perspectives..I tend to be fond of blurred images..

Specially in this city, they often capture in ways better than the perfect frozen shot...

Randoms of whence I speak:



Wall Street and Broadway

From The Sandman Book X: The Wake

Jed: So I get to be 'Uncle Jed'. Coool. Families rock.
Rose: I thought you were the one that said 'Families suck'.
Jed: They do. They rock AND they suck.

One of the reasons I moved to New York was to be, at least, physically closer to my immediate family.

Closeness to family is no longer a priority.

I feel sad about it, and it feels like Im one of a minority.

Its no longer a reason.

The ties dont bind.

Although Im not leaving never to return, I dont think Ive missed out on anything NY that I wish I had gotten around to.

- Museums. I did miss the MoMA and Guggenheim.. but honestly, most museums Ive been to bore the daylights out of me. I did go to the Intrepid, and saw 'The Blackbird' up close, which I woulda been upset if I missed.

- Its funny, I woulda been upset if I left and didnt see the Ricki Lake show. For some reason, I needed to see that.
I did, finally.

- I came here looking for the Famous New York Cheesecake and Pizza.
I may have missed it, but everything Ive tried here, Lombardo's and Junior's included.. didnt excite me.

I guess I just dont like to feel Ive 'missed' things.. and Im doing some delightful things as I tie up loose ends, so its all good.

Good.

Looking back...

I think the best time I had taking pictures in NY was around the summer of 2000.

Physically I felt like absolute crap, but creatively it was awesome.

I was experimenting with taking shots and not taking the time to look through the camera.

So, I would glimpse the scene, feel it, stick my hand out and see what happened....

Once I had the technique down a bit, I could go to town with it. Took awhile.

F'rinstance, some random Chinatown shots doing this:





This is ABSOLUTELY one of my personal favorite shots.
A young mom, the kid standing on the stroller, the friend cooing at the kid.. all as the crowds swirled by.
I just put my hand out as I was walking by .. and clicked.

Its the glow on the kid's face that still makes me smile...







Another of my favorite shots.
I saw her walking briskly down Canal, and it was her confident stride and proud bearing that caught my attention.
The cheekbones helped too. :-)

I had all of 5 seconds to power up the camera, keep my hand down and steady, and catch her as she strode by.







That period of time is about when I really started trying to define my dreams and inclinations.

Where they turned from unfulfilled frustration into need.

"I NEED to do..."

It wasnt until I went to San Francisco where I started getting the answers I needed, even though it took me a long time afterward (as in most of 2001) to figure out what questions to ask.

Thank god I wasnt distracted, like with money, work or girlfriends, right? :-/

Recent email convo between me an' Em...

<< "Left Brain. Right Brain. CONNECT!" >>

Good lord...where did you get THAT?

<< Made it up from "Your Lips. God's Ear. CONNECT!!" (do it in a gay style and it just sounds funnier... :-)

I got it from a nightly radio show in New York called the "Ron & Fez Show" (www.ronfez.net). Their schtick is Ron being the 'very straight guy from Philly' and Fez 'the very gay sidekick'.
(They seem to treat each other with much affection and respect, I have to add).

Anyway, on occasion you'll get gay jokes and ribald songs (my personal favorite version being 'GET YOUR BALLS OUT!' that Fez does with Ethel Merman Broadway-style enthusiasm)... and sometimes the witticisms come pouring out -usually on Friday nights, the designated drinking night- which is where I got that version of "From your lips to god's ear". >>

God that would be fun...flamers on the radio...

Heh. It is occasionally hilarious, but I think he has a slight muzzle on to downplay his orientation to avoid.. uhh, misunderstandings from the ignant people..

*Fez voice* 'Theyre just people!"

Anyhoo, I bring this up to set up a bit from Fez I just heard that had me rollin...

On the show, they have a few staffers (listeners that became employees) that are overweight, and have recently had their stomachs/intestines stapled to lose weight.

They never really shut up about it, and during one of these 'staples' bits, Fez deadpans in Ad Testimonial style:

I am a Large Man, so I had staples put on my di*k.

Heeheehee. :-)

Resurrecting an old CD I'd made last year.. entitled "Joe's Writing Playlist.. Play very very loud."

So .. starting with "Boogie Oogie Oogie"
------------
Snowing outside as the first real snowstorm of the winter blows through the city.

Not blizzardlike, but definitely falling on the sideways tip.
----------
Da Brat's "Funkdafied", Kool Moe Dee's "How Ya Like Me Now"...
---------
Went to the Haitian barbershop for my perfect razor-cut.

I left feeling unsatisfied. *sigh*

I got the cut by my OLD barber, the Jamaican... a refugee from the now closed shop down the street. Shit.

Its not a BAD cut, but a Jamaican barber, us Jamaicans being stubborn cusses, did it his way, instead of following what I asked for.

"Leave about half an inch"
"Okay"

I now possess a 2 millimeter high fade.

Gah. Im gonna be wearing a hat this cold winter.

Not a badcut, but not what I asked for.

Next time, Im waiting for the gay haitian with the beret.
--------------
EU's "Da Butt"...
-------------
Growing up, I was all egalitarian, and shared the idealistic view that ghetto's (ie: an area predominantly populated by a certain race or culture) was not an ideal thing and something that the world would best work against.

Growing older, Im starting to appreciate them..

Like this Caribbean/Orthodox Jewish ghetto in Crown Heights.

In the barber shop, a female client walks in, greeting everyone in french creole accent... "'Appy New Yahr! 'Appy New Yahr!"

Heh..

Local supermarket, in the checkout line with my fresh-baked rolls (4 large an' soft portuguese rolls for fifty cents... I love NY)

The haitian lady checking me out has her son bagging groceries

Her daughter comes up.. and the son starts speaking in Creole

"No, dont speak in french. Mommy doesnt want us to talk in french."

I hadda smile.

I wasnt smiling when I stormed back after I realized that the haitian lady hadnt given me back my change.

Honest mistake. But I wasnt backing down over 3 dollars.

The drawer count (New Yorkers claim they dont get their change back all the time...) showed her drawer was indeed 3 bux and 2 cents over.

----------
Shaggy and Janet Jackson "Mr Lover"
---------
Ive been vague about exactly when Im leaving, but the date got firmer as Ive started sending inquires for work OutThere.

Tammy: You really moving out there?
Me: Im about 85 percent sure.

With me sending out resumes and inquiries for meetings, the probability went up to 95 percent.

When Tracy excitedly had me call her for a job at her place, I wasnt as sure. Momentarily.

For the right job I would stay?

As I send out the resumes, I realized .. sure. But unless it was something REALLY good, nah.

So, as I follow my dreams and the probability of me leaving rises back into the mid-90's...

Now.. if I could be as sure of being able to swing the ticket for the cross-country train trip...
----------------
Digital Underground's "Humpty Dance"

Nothing to write here.. this is where I do the Humpty Dance :-)

Now gather round
Im the new FOOL in town

I like my beats funky
Im spunky
I like my Oatmeal lumpy
Im sick wit dis.

I'll get stoopid
I'll use a word that dont mean nuttin'
Like 'looptid'

I told you that I like to bite..
Well, its also obvious that I like to Write

Ahhh Yeah. Perfect stuff to write to. :-)

How to do the Humpty Dance?

You got it down
When you appear to be in pain

Arent the best things in life often like that? :-)

Black People
Do the HumptyHump
White People
Do the HumptyHump
Puerto Ricans
Do the HumptyHump
SAMOANS!
Do the HumptyHump

LETS. GET. STUPID!
Do the HumptyHump

:-)
---------------