I hadnt been back East for 3 years. I was last there in July of 2002.

I had specific things I wanted to do:

See my Ma

Take pictures

Jamaican food

Get a haircut

Family requires no explanation. Taking pictures meant that I needed time to wander which means I needed time to be alone. Jamaican food. I have not had a patty and a coco bread in THREE YEARS. A haircut. I have not ever had a good haircut here on the West Coast. I cannot exaggerate this fact. I needed my hair cut and lined, properly. New Yorkers dont tolerate shitty haircuts.

Everything else was off my radar. I'd been waiting a long time.

Oh yeah, i needed a real New York bagel.
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From the man who has been cutting my hair in Brooklyn for over 20 years ..

"Where've you been?"
"Living in San Francisco now. Been gone for 3 years."
"Ok, ok. Well, you look good, although youve got more grey around your temples and youre a little ... wider."
"Heheh, Ive got a desk job." :)

From someone seeing me get back from the trip, bags in hand.

"You just got back from a trip, huh."
"Yes ma'am."
"That's good. You look ... recharged."

I feel recharged.
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Im like a puppy. I dont mind being picked up, fed, kissed and loved. But I will scratch at the door and whine loudly so i can be free to go wander.

Which s why I now prefer to travel without socializing and meetups. I dont mind them and its usually a joy to see people, but it takes TIMEto do this. This cuts into my walkabout time, which is LIMITED when Im travelling. Plus, being on other people's schedules makes me cranky, frankly.

Which is why I kept telling people I simply didnt have time to see them, sorry.

The only reason I saw the folk I did was was that i was manipulated (G was gonna be in town that weekend anyway, and it was her birthday, sooo.....), nagged and bought (sweetly by The Cappy who - coincidentally - called and offered her place to hang at, and she needed her computer brought back to life) and threatened (Tracy promised to swing a tire-iron upside my head if I didnt show my face..).

I wouldna traded the time with them for the world.

But I still wish I'd had more time to go walkabout.
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Yeah, being back around folk who KNOW me was good. And I even found some of my stuff from back then.

After being around people who are trying to figure out who I am, where Im coming from et al.. its nice to be around folk I dont have to explain myself with.

Somehow, these years of being Lost in California kinda made me question my own identity.

I feel like Ive re-established my identity. With myself, if not with anyone else.