@ the Internet Cafe, while I wait for the train, my bags already checked in ..

Heh. Theyre playing albums straight through now, instead of random muzak.

In the system.. Eryka Badu's "Baduism".

Great album.

-------
Dimitri, the car service driver on ride from Brooklyn to Penn Station this morning...

"I used to live in California.
I moved here from LA. Pasadena. You know where? About 2 months ago.
Yeah, I like New York, the city.. but the people *gaahr*.. cant stand it.

I think everybody should live in New York at least 2 or 3 years out of their lives.

You live here, you can go anywhere else and make it. Because its tough here.

You know what you can do here that you cant do out in California? You cant just pick up and do your own thing. You need to use other peoples money.
Here, I put a little money together, bought this car, got the licenses and Im makin a little money. Out there I gotta work with a big company and use their car.
You need a lot of money to do anything out there.

And out there, you dont have the little shops, the little (bodegas). You gotta go to a mall or a.. a.. 7-11. Not like here where you got these little shops, these little restaurants.

But, I like California."

What he said.
----------------
I feel the love.

I hung out with Tracy and folk and talked late into the night.

I was coddled/mothered/scolded with wine and Vicks vapor rub. :-)

By the time I woke up, I could breathe and I wasnt as stuffed up.

I was having some VERY weird dreams there though...

Heh, it's a small thing, but this is very symbolic of how New Yorkers are..

Me and Tracy rode the train to Atlantic Avenue, where we had different connecting trains...

She had to make a certain train, so she gave me a crushing hug (the best kind) a few words of goodbye and goodluck , and then I watched her sprint off through the tunnels to make her train.

New Yorkers, theyre always rushing off to be somewhere else. :-)

But if they'll make the time for ya.. thas love theyre showing ya.



----------

--- Your Grace wrote:

> Heh. I love this...it looks like the guy is doing
> his best to get up to
> speed on NY lore.

Heheh. Actually, if you go on the subway, everybody
has a book or paper to read.

For some, it keeps them from having to stare at other
people's mugs on the train, and for others its 'quiet'
time to catch up on reading.

So this guy had grabbed the book and flipping to his
place in it...

Im telling ya.. EVERYBODY, it seems, reads here.

> I do, too. Read on the bus, that is. What struck
> me was the blurring of
> the pages, and the relationship to the sign behind
> him, as in "getting up to
> speed"
> Keep em coming, hon.
>
> Love, Poo.

----------------
Smetimes, beforeI leave I'll gaze upon a place, knowing that it's likely that'll be the last time I'll see that scene.

Looking around today.. it doesnt look or feel like the last time.

Hm. This should be interesting.

Random memories..

Havta interrupt this reverie..

Got a train to catch.

Time to go
-----------------

Full speed ahead.

But, as is the wont of the gods, not in the expected direction and not on my timetable. Natch.

My horroscope recently said that something unpleasant would point me in the right direction. So, not to do anything stupid, like fighting the inevitable.

Sure you right.

So, Im blowing the joint sooner than expected, leaving a few ends loose.

No turning back when youve made the decision - and so the story goes.

Not yet packed, sleep deprived, sinuses clogged, still coughing, not in the best of moods.. great start.

Someone point me out the positive outlook I'll need? Thanx.

----------
The most precious thing in this city is finding a place to get some sleep.

Try to find one if you dont have it.

I rode the subways last night, and men, women, young old, black, white were desperately looking for sleep. Uninterrupted sleep.

The internet cafe, they monitor folk and wake you up if you fall asleep in front of the monitor.

Right now, Im hearing a chorus of snores from otherwise well-dressed men.

For a city that prides itself on running 24-7, the most cruel thing is to deprive people of sleep.

And if you dont have it....

No reason, the modo.net ads were thought provoking...






Then they went *poof*.

Fortis Cadere Cedere Non Potest, y'all.

Damned skippy.

Apparently, I am breaking NY municipal law.

Im frequently expectorating * as I deal with NY's latest bug.

Its defining characteristic is a deep continuous cough. Caught it almost as soon as I hit New York. Serves me right.

Now, I gain strength from the hacking smoker's like coughing all around me.

The cough is so endemic and uncontrollable, that people try to bum cigarettes from me several times a day..

"Can I get a cigarette off you, big man?"
"No man.. I dont smoke... *HACK cough cough cough* "
"You dont got any?"
" *cough cough cough.. I. Dont. SMOKE."
(eyes narrowed, with a disbelieving look) "Oh. aright."
*cough cough HACK.. ptui!*

The internet cafe, subways and buses resound with the coughing....

And the *splat* of large loogies.

Hey, Im a responsible citizen. I spit into the rapidly melting snow/ice piles.

* informative link on the wonderful qualities of spit via george

There is a point when you know you need a break from New York.

I THINK I have glimpsed when and why that is.

When you gotta give reasons over and over as to why you like New York... it almost begs for a fresh perspective.

Liking New York is not a religion. New York aint a religion.

It is an expression of sublime energy, in ways large and small.

But...

I need a fresh...no, a slightly different..perspective.

If only for awhile.

It's time.

-------------
Speaking of slightly different perspectives..I tend to be fond of blurred images..

Specially in this city, they often capture in ways better than the perfect frozen shot...

Randoms of whence I speak:



Wall Street and Broadway

From The Sandman Book X: The Wake

Jed: So I get to be 'Uncle Jed'. Coool. Families rock.
Rose: I thought you were the one that said 'Families suck'.
Jed: They do. They rock AND they suck.

One of the reasons I moved to New York was to be, at least, physically closer to my immediate family.

Closeness to family is no longer a priority.

I feel sad about it, and it feels like Im one of a minority.

Its no longer a reason.

The ties dont bind.

Although Im not leaving never to return, I dont think Ive missed out on anything NY that I wish I had gotten around to.

- Museums. I did miss the MoMA and Guggenheim.. but honestly, most museums Ive been to bore the daylights out of me. I did go to the Intrepid, and saw 'The Blackbird' up close, which I woulda been upset if I missed.

- Its funny, I woulda been upset if I left and didnt see the Ricki Lake show. For some reason, I needed to see that.
I did, finally.

- I came here looking for the Famous New York Cheesecake and Pizza.
I may have missed it, but everything Ive tried here, Lombardo's and Junior's included.. didnt excite me.

I guess I just dont like to feel Ive 'missed' things.. and Im doing some delightful things as I tie up loose ends, so its all good.

Good.

Looking back...

I think the best time I had taking pictures in NY was around the summer of 2000.

Physically I felt like absolute crap, but creatively it was awesome.

I was experimenting with taking shots and not taking the time to look through the camera.

So, I would glimpse the scene, feel it, stick my hand out and see what happened....

Once I had the technique down a bit, I could go to town with it. Took awhile.

F'rinstance, some random Chinatown shots doing this:





This is ABSOLUTELY one of my personal favorite shots.
A young mom, the kid standing on the stroller, the friend cooing at the kid.. all as the crowds swirled by.
I just put my hand out as I was walking by .. and clicked.

Its the glow on the kid's face that still makes me smile...







Another of my favorite shots.
I saw her walking briskly down Canal, and it was her confident stride and proud bearing that caught my attention.
The cheekbones helped too. :-)

I had all of 5 seconds to power up the camera, keep my hand down and steady, and catch her as she strode by.







That period of time is about when I really started trying to define my dreams and inclinations.

Where they turned from unfulfilled frustration into need.

"I NEED to do..."

It wasnt until I went to San Francisco where I started getting the answers I needed, even though it took me a long time afterward (as in most of 2001) to figure out what questions to ask.

Thank god I wasnt distracted, like with money, work or girlfriends, right? :-/

Recent email convo between me an' Em...

<< "Left Brain. Right Brain. CONNECT!" >>

Good lord...where did you get THAT?

<< Made it up from "Your Lips. God's Ear. CONNECT!!" (do it in a gay style and it just sounds funnier... :-)

I got it from a nightly radio show in New York called the "Ron & Fez Show" (www.ronfez.net). Their schtick is Ron being the 'very straight guy from Philly' and Fez 'the very gay sidekick'.
(They seem to treat each other with much affection and respect, I have to add).

Anyway, on occasion you'll get gay jokes and ribald songs (my personal favorite version being 'GET YOUR BALLS OUT!' that Fez does with Ethel Merman Broadway-style enthusiasm)... and sometimes the witticisms come pouring out -usually on Friday nights, the designated drinking night- which is where I got that version of "From your lips to god's ear". >>

God that would be fun...flamers on the radio...

Heh. It is occasionally hilarious, but I think he has a slight muzzle on to downplay his orientation to avoid.. uhh, misunderstandings from the ignant people..

*Fez voice* 'Theyre just people!"

Anyhoo, I bring this up to set up a bit from Fez I just heard that had me rollin...

On the show, they have a few staffers (listeners that became employees) that are overweight, and have recently had their stomachs/intestines stapled to lose weight.

They never really shut up about it, and during one of these 'staples' bits, Fez deadpans in Ad Testimonial style:

I am a Large Man, so I had staples put on my di*k.

Heeheehee. :-)

Resurrecting an old CD I'd made last year.. entitled "Joe's Writing Playlist.. Play very very loud."

So .. starting with "Boogie Oogie Oogie"
------------
Snowing outside as the first real snowstorm of the winter blows through the city.

Not blizzardlike, but definitely falling on the sideways tip.
----------
Da Brat's "Funkdafied", Kool Moe Dee's "How Ya Like Me Now"...
---------
Went to the Haitian barbershop for my perfect razor-cut.

I left feeling unsatisfied. *sigh*

I got the cut by my OLD barber, the Jamaican... a refugee from the now closed shop down the street. Shit.

Its not a BAD cut, but a Jamaican barber, us Jamaicans being stubborn cusses, did it his way, instead of following what I asked for.

"Leave about half an inch"
"Okay"

I now possess a 2 millimeter high fade.

Gah. Im gonna be wearing a hat this cold winter.

Not a badcut, but not what I asked for.

Next time, Im waiting for the gay haitian with the beret.
--------------
EU's "Da Butt"...
-------------
Growing up, I was all egalitarian, and shared the idealistic view that ghetto's (ie: an area predominantly populated by a certain race or culture) was not an ideal thing and something that the world would best work against.

Growing older, Im starting to appreciate them..

Like this Caribbean/Orthodox Jewish ghetto in Crown Heights.

In the barber shop, a female client walks in, greeting everyone in french creole accent... "'Appy New Yahr! 'Appy New Yahr!"

Heh..

Local supermarket, in the checkout line with my fresh-baked rolls (4 large an' soft portuguese rolls for fifty cents... I love NY)

The haitian lady checking me out has her son bagging groceries

Her daughter comes up.. and the son starts speaking in Creole

"No, dont speak in french. Mommy doesnt want us to talk in french."

I hadda smile.

I wasnt smiling when I stormed back after I realized that the haitian lady hadnt given me back my change.

Honest mistake. But I wasnt backing down over 3 dollars.

The drawer count (New Yorkers claim they dont get their change back all the time...) showed her drawer was indeed 3 bux and 2 cents over.

----------
Shaggy and Janet Jackson "Mr Lover"
---------
Ive been vague about exactly when Im leaving, but the date got firmer as Ive started sending inquires for work OutThere.

Tammy: You really moving out there?
Me: Im about 85 percent sure.

With me sending out resumes and inquiries for meetings, the probability went up to 95 percent.

When Tracy excitedly had me call her for a job at her place, I wasnt as sure. Momentarily.

For the right job I would stay?

As I send out the resumes, I realized .. sure. But unless it was something REALLY good, nah.

So, as I follow my dreams and the probability of me leaving rises back into the mid-90's...

Now.. if I could be as sure of being able to swing the ticket for the cross-country train trip...
----------------
Digital Underground's "Humpty Dance"

Nothing to write here.. this is where I do the Humpty Dance :-)

Now gather round
Im the new FOOL in town

I like my beats funky
Im spunky
I like my Oatmeal lumpy
Im sick wit dis.

I'll get stoopid
I'll use a word that dont mean nuttin'
Like 'looptid'

I told you that I like to bite..
Well, its also obvious that I like to Write

Ahhh Yeah. Perfect stuff to write to. :-)

How to do the Humpty Dance?

You got it down
When you appear to be in pain

Arent the best things in life often like that? :-)

Black People
Do the HumptyHump
White People
Do the HumptyHump
Puerto Ricans
Do the HumptyHump
SAMOANS!
Do the HumptyHump

LETS. GET. STUPID!
Do the HumptyHump

:-)
---------------