Saturday, April 05, 2008
Thursday, April 03, 2008
You may be a thrill seeker right now, but you're also testing a strategy. A difficult situation will begin to stabilize over the next few days. There is no need to take any drastic measures. Let the events unfold without trying to influence the outcome.
Im feeling happy, but its a teeny bit scary.
I realized today, that the circumstances of me leaving SF is almost the same as what was happening when I left New York.
Poverty and leaving my place.
Thats a bad pattern. I dont want to live like that. This will not happen again.
I dont want to feel like I HAVE to leave someplace, I should be able to leave whenever I desire. However, inertia is a bad habit to break. I never really thought of SF as 'home' and I wanted to travel and eventually leave NY anyway, but still.
No, no no. That is bad.
And money alone isnt the solution.
Trying to finish an overdue library book. Waaay overdue. Like 2 or 3 years?
Anyway, it is "Career Management for the Creative Person", and its speaking to me, giving insight into my working patterns over the past 25 years. I didnt realize I was so fundamentally right-brained. Damn.
Heh, prolly why its overdue too. Id like to finish and return it before I leave town.
Still, it makes good points about being TOO right brained and creative, which is impeding my professional progress. The message being imparted is: Its ok to be creative and have that be your primary focus, but I dont have to be poor to do it.
Thats right on time. I do need to hear and work on that.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
I may SAY money isnt a big deal to me, but I would definitely rather have it than not.
I wouldnt mind being a Billionaire. I'll even make do as a multi-millionaire. Although there are people around who are sad that they only have a few million in the bank.
As Chef Gareth Blackstock would say: "Pooor baybees."
Its getting to the point where you cant just be a system admin, you have to be able to script in Python, PHP, Ruby and C. I never became a programmer, because A) Im not detail oriented. B) It gives me a headache. C) Gave me a headache when I tried to learn it high school.
Plus, theyre asking $20.99 for that magazine!!! It's a good magazine, but I can get several programming tomes for that money....
At least it gives regular folk hope that they too can program. :)
15 years ago I was a very good chess player, confident enough to play for money. Now, I can move pieces, thats it. )
Back then I played every day against very good street players and honed my games playing midnight matches against the clock.
This game is being played for money, with the challenger having 5:00 minutes to win and the other player giving him the handicap of having only 1.30 seconds to win. Two dollars a game.
Like all fools, I wouldve taken that challenge. 15 years ago. :)
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Monday, March 31, 2008
No room for anything else.
I remember when a traveller from Egypt gave me his backpack, boots and a coat. Expensive, top of the line gear. I now understand why he gave his stuff up. He was going to Thailand, leaving the Bay Area. What the hell would he need all that crap for?
I have expensive coats. Heavy. Why would I need that for Southern California. Just because it cost a lot, it weighs me down and takes up space. Damn, but its nice - I dont want to give it up, but I frankly dont need it for where Im going. When I went to Hawaii, the clothes and shoes Id worn from SF felt like armour, I quickly went to the goodwill and bought shorts, light shirts and flip flops, then tossed it before I went back. I couldve travelled to Hawaii with a near empty bag.
Its only because this coat is nearly brand new and expensive. But I wont need it. And I dont want to store anything i wont ultimately need.
3 bags. Ounces count.
I didnt realize just how done I am with San Francisco until I tried to think of something to go photograph. Cant think of a damned thing, and the prospect of freezing when the sun goes down shooting no longer appeals to me.
My jacket has the funk of being worn daily for the past six months, even with washing. I have worn this jacket almost every day when it hasnt been raining since AUGUST. And even before then. The sun goes down, the jacket goes on. My god. Thats a depressing thought. Even in New York or Chicago - I have never worn outerware for as long as I do here.
Ugh. I am done.
Now that my phone has finally been reactivated, I can go look for temp work to get a little cash before I start travelling. The lack of a phone never used to bother me, but it is a huge hindrance when youre trying to go somewhere.
Hopefully, its not too late.