Monday, May 15, 2006

Push man, PUSH.

How does
that line from "Raspberry Beret" go?

He told me several times that he didn't like my kind
'Cause I was a bit 2 leisurely

Seems that I was busy doing something close 2 nothing
But different than the day before

Yup, that's me. A bit 2 liesurely.

Even people who know me, and know me well - believe I am totally that way, that I am some sort of a sap, until I ramp up the intensity, show claws, get serious and accomplish things so quickly it takes their breath away.

Then they believe.

Still, I tend not to do things till Im pushed out of my comfort zones. Im almost too patient. That's not always good. That's why I tend to make things a little uncomfortable for myself, so then when Im quite sick of things the way they are, changes are made.

Still, that tendency isnt all bad. Saves my bacon from time time. Has kept me from plunging over the edge, engage in risky behaviors, squirreled out the the.. heh.. .unbelievers, removed the distractions, given things a chance.

F'rinstance, my year contract with Yahoo DSL is over. They raised the rates. They frikken cut it off.

They did warn me. Sent letters I ignored as is my wont. Then they cut my service off. Primarily to get my attention.

Freak out? Nah. That's what my rarely used AOL account is for. Wouldve made sense to not pay 23 bux a month, but inertia, as well as a finely keened instinct I dont always understand, kept me from pulling that trigger to save money. And it gives me time to explore my options.

What does that do for me? Gives me options. Chess has taught me most things are a matter of time and distance. Money, love, friendship, joy, anger, experience. All about time and distance. Give yourself enough time, you have more options, you can go the distance.

Still, given a choice - I would rather have things happen directly and decisively. And Im tired of needing to be pushed.

DSL, trivial. My life? Not so much.

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