Id actually been pondering the question these last few days...

Then mars asked me how I like being alone again, finally.

I said: I liked it. I truly like being alone. And yet, I needed to feel connected to others to function.

Which is funny, as it shows how much Ive changed over the last year.
Because when people flake on me, I want to disconnect. I turn off the buddy list, turn off the phone, go walkabout.

Kate sez Im far too sensitive.
Just because Im touchy when people lie and flake.
She doesnt know the half of it.

I just dont like being around silly people, and Im not all that expansive in real life anyway.

I can do without.I prefer my own company.
In fact, I rather LIKE being grumpy and anti-social.

Thats why I give people space. I dont EVER want to be thought of as clingy or stalkerish.

I dont want to care THAT much.

But lately, i find myself not necessarily wanting to disconnect, even though I would rather not concern myself with the silly and self-absorbed.

They might think I truly give a shit.

But lately, I just want to *disengage*.. not disconnect. Retreat, not shut everyone out.

I may like my solitude, but I dont want to disconnect forever.
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