Heh. Cyn is on a ruminative kick I think.

Because we share the same birthday and some of the same values and characteristics.. she oft plugs into some of my stuff.

And me hers.

She calls my life right now, "indulging my wild side", as she ponders things in her 5/2 entry...

Eh.. she might be transferring a bit tho.... :-)

>
>i read your journal and feel that you gave
>in to that /wild side/, joey bro.

?????

What wild side?

Just cuz I said "fuck" fifty times? :-)

Or are we talkin bout my stubborn life choices?

>
>and i slightly envy you for it.

A lot of people do, but obviously its not a choice for the faint-hearted.

I dunno, I cant imagine living much differently anymore.

For someone who is as averse to change as I am, loves being at home and would rather cuddle for days..

I like being itinerant.

Maybe because I always feel like an outsider.

Even among friends and family.

>
>altho, i think, like me, you would be happier
>with a love and a home and some stability?
>

Maybe.. although I dont feel Ive ever really had that.

I wonder if I really desire that anymore...

Its ironic. Ive had women tell me I look like the type who desperately wants that life, and then become non-plussed when they find instead I tend to run away from that ideal.

And would rather give THEM their freedom than try to take it.

I dunno. After years of often feeling relief whenever a relationship ends... maybe Ive grown used to the idea of not joining my life with another.

Its really gotta be worth it now.

>but perhaps i assume.
>
>i dunno.

Heh. Could be you see solutions that you think would take care of the discomforts of my life.

And I see some of those solutions as choices that exact a price im not willing to pay in the long run.

In life, it turns out its easier to make the hard choices, than to choose the seemingly easy route.

And I know *you* know this to be true, stubborn sistah. :-)

>
>/hugs/ cyn

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. much appreciated luv. :-)

Eh, everything will turn out the way theyre supposed to.

Much love

Joey

I think she DOES understand tho.

But for the forseeable future.. for me.. life isnt anywhere near being about love and marriage.
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