"Listen" I said self-righteously to someone who said she didnt get it with men, "dont just hear and then jump to judgements when a man talks..listen. Listen before he gives up and starts telling you what you want to hear. He is usually telling you everything you need to know."

Which is true.

The other day I kept saying..
"Youre an incredible woman.. and smarter than most folk I know. Yes, maybe even smarter than me."
"Audrey Hepburn's eyes?? You want Audrey Hepburn's eyes? Youve gotta be kidding. Good god woman - youve got YOUR eyes... Audrey Hepburn would KILL to have yours.."
"Youve gotta think cocky. When you talk, you KNOW you can back the shit up. Act as if youre the BADDEST mofo on the planet..."

Which is all true. Nothing she hasnt heard before either.

But I was puzzled, and slightly concerned that she needed to hear all that which is patently obvious.. broke my heart to see the doubt and frustration in her eyes.

So, I asked a Woman of Maturity and Wisdom to tell me why.

Why will some women crave and abandon responsibility for almost all they know to be true and right.. just for that deep need for attention and approval? Why is blame all laid on the altar of 'self-esteem'?

I get it and yet, I dont get it.

So, she told me a story.. and I listened. She told me other stories.

And I tried to listen. And hear.

From JettaGirl..

Today. I was cranky this morning, but that is completely related to the fact that I am a girl who has a lot of hormones.

And CubicleGirl

I also realized this morning on the way in, that I totally was playing (a) girl last night when the (friends) came over for to take my air conditioner away. Meaning. I was all like "ohhhhh socket wrench set? Whatever do you mean???"
Yeah. I KNOW. So bizarre. Do you ever do that? Just stand back and watch yourself doing things like that. I was screaming at myself the whole time going... YOU KNOW HOW TO FIX AIR CONDITIONERS FOR GOD'S SAKE QUIT ACTING STUPID.
As The Really Good Friend would say... I have been trained well by the patriarchy.
That happens sometimes.
I'm working on it.

Next time I'll try not to go 'shh' when Im trying to hear....
-----------