`At 15, I had my mind bent on learning. At 30, I stood firm. At 40, I had no doubts. At 50, I knew the decrees of Heaven. At 60, my ear was an obedient organ for the reception of truth. At 70, I could follow what my heart desired, without transgressing what was right."
- Confucious
Wednesday, December 31, 2003
AM I happy?
*sigh*
Yes.
Not where I'd like to be, but where Im supposed to be.
I am alone with many many friends and acquaintances spread all over the world.
The poseurs get weeded out and the real ones stick around, as it should be.
DO I wish I were wealthy and healthy and not having to endure?
Yes.
Am I slightly afraid that when I move on from this tour of character building, I'll lose a lot of good things?
Yes.
More than folk who think Im down and out could ever know.
And I give thanks.
But...
I have to move up, and it's time to move on.
Next year, the resolution is to get everything going.
Cuz its time.
---
daQueen looked at me in my wool beanie cap sticking far up my head, in the bright red North Face coat, and said smiling..
"You look like Frosty the snowman."
Hee.
I serpose I do at that.
Figgypudding. ;-)
*sigh*
Yes.
Not where I'd like to be, but where Im supposed to be.
I am alone with many many friends and acquaintances spread all over the world.
The poseurs get weeded out and the real ones stick around, as it should be.
DO I wish I were wealthy and healthy and not having to endure?
Yes.
Am I slightly afraid that when I move on from this tour of character building, I'll lose a lot of good things?
Yes.
More than folk who think Im down and out could ever know.
And I give thanks.
But...
I have to move up, and it's time to move on.
Next year, the resolution is to get everything going.
Cuz its time.
---
daQueen looked at me in my wool beanie cap sticking far up my head, in the bright red North Face coat, and said smiling..
"You look like Frosty the snowman."
Hee.
I serpose I do at that.
Figgypudding. ;-)
Randoms from 2003
The view over the Bay to San Francisco, from the Berkeley Hills above the UC Berkeley campus.
Shitza, it was cold that day.
Morning coffee from Rainbow Donuts, San Pablo and University
Part of the street scene on Telegraph Avenue
Lotsa old, rusting motorcycles around Berkeley.
UC Berkeley, Finals.
Quirky and cute, Berkeley is.
Music for money in front of the Berkeley BART station.
Mutzu, the cat. Old Deathbreath has lost weight. Worried about him.
Acton House Peace protest project, following them from start to finish
Trevor and his pops
The rains turn everything green after awhile
Aiyah. The notebook was never the same again.
A fellow August 29'er. *Her* name is Madonna. No lie.
Although beautiful, I hardly go into San Francisco anymore.
The parties got old after awhile.
Pretty flowers tho...
George lifted my spirits on a regular basis.
Beautiful place.
There was more...
Tuesday, December 30, 2003
Ive met myself, and Im Nuts.
Friday, the co-founder of Web-TV, Phil Goldman , died. He was 39.
He was only a month and a half older than I.
I did meet the guy, and as charmed as I was by his charisma, wit, intelligence and ambition, I was troubled by something.
He was nuts.
Ive met a few other men who are fellow summer of '64 folk.
There was something about them that I recognized.
They were all like in one degree or another.
Incredibly smart, blunt talkin', wild eyed, imaginative, creative, highly opinionated, driven, fellow Dragons
They all wanted to change the world in one way or another, but in their own way. Grandiose, flaming plans.
Fucking nuts.
And I aim to do that too.
Although one guy, who makes postcards drawn by homeless folk from all over the country, wants to sail across the atlantic on a boat made from Oil Drums.
I dont think Im anywhere that nuts.
I dont think.
-------
Oh wait, I aim to travel the world as a photographer and writer, publish, sell clothes, designs, images, music, documentaries and start a non-profit co-op.
For starters.
Jeez, I DO sound nuts.
"James is very, very smart, very tough, can be extremely ornery at times, but is extremely fair, and extraordinarily generous," said his friend Sellam Ismail, founder of the Vintage Computer Festival.
"That's pretty impressive for one guy," Ismail said.
Wired Magazine article on James Burgett and his organization, The Alameda County Computer Resource Center.
Friday, the co-founder of Web-TV, Phil Goldman , died. He was 39.
He was only a month and a half older than I.
I did meet the guy, and as charmed as I was by his charisma, wit, intelligence and ambition, I was troubled by something.
He was nuts.
Ive met a few other men who are fellow summer of '64 folk.
There was something about them that I recognized.
They were all like in one degree or another.
Incredibly smart, blunt talkin', wild eyed, imaginative, creative, highly opinionated, driven, fellow Dragons
They all wanted to change the world in one way or another, but in their own way. Grandiose, flaming plans.
Fucking nuts.
And I aim to do that too.
Although one guy, who makes postcards drawn by homeless folk from all over the country, wants to sail across the atlantic on a boat made from Oil Drums.
I dont think Im anywhere that nuts.
I dont think.
-------
Oh wait, I aim to travel the world as a photographer and writer, publish, sell clothes, designs, images, music, documentaries and start a non-profit co-op.
For starters.
Jeez, I DO sound nuts.
Monday, December 29, 2003
Why she is still my favorite Coiner of Terms
or
Im just a junkie for quirkily apt and illuminating phrases
From Angeline
..It's usually full of papery elderly ladies with scary faces, Hip Young Trendoids, and the Obligatory MAC Counter Staffed By Frightening Young Prettigoths Armed With Aggressive Makeup Brushes And That One Black Glove.
*snArx*
She kills me.
Give it up
I got many gifts over the holidays. Mostly stuff to keep me warm. Gloves, wool caps, scarves, fleece vests.
Brand new stuff.
Im grateful, but... Too much stuff. I dont need it all.
Ive given a lot of it away.
"Dude, you have too much stuff to be homeless.." someone said to me recently.
He's right. I need to get rid of shit. Before Im on the move again.
And I have to be ruthless about it.
In a Previous Life, I had a lot of stuff. And I thought back then I was living La Vido Lightweight. Silly.
A few years ago, I realized I had Way Too Much Stuff, and endeavored to live the laptop life.
When I left Florida I had two suitcases, a duffel bag, a backpack and two laptop bags.
And I thought I had lightened my life's load. Hah!
Now Im down to two backpacks, and a large duffel bag.
I still have too much fuckin' stuff.
I have to be more ruthless.
Imagine this as your life's goal:
To have everything you need to live life as carry-on luggage. Not for a trip. Your daily life.
Every ounce becomes important, as you move around with it.
It can be done, Im here to tell you. But its hard, Im also here to tell you.
It requires eternal vigilance. And sometimes, your stuff disappears (hopefully nothing important like papers ID and whatnot), and it feels like a blessing.
A great benefit of lightening the load?
You make room for better stuff to come into your life.
Im here to tell ya. :-)
---
And no, we're not just talking about 'stuff'.
I got many gifts over the holidays. Mostly stuff to keep me warm. Gloves, wool caps, scarves, fleece vests.
Brand new stuff.
Im grateful, but... Too much stuff. I dont need it all.
Ive given a lot of it away.
"Dude, you have too much stuff to be homeless.." someone said to me recently.
He's right. I need to get rid of shit. Before Im on the move again.
And I have to be ruthless about it.
In a Previous Life, I had a lot of stuff. And I thought back then I was living La Vido Lightweight. Silly.
A few years ago, I realized I had Way Too Much Stuff, and endeavored to live the laptop life.
When I left Florida I had two suitcases, a duffel bag, a backpack and two laptop bags.
And I thought I had lightened my life's load. Hah!
Now Im down to two backpacks, and a large duffel bag.
I still have too much fuckin' stuff.
I have to be more ruthless.
Imagine this as your life's goal:
To have everything you need to live life as carry-on luggage. Not for a trip. Your daily life.
Every ounce becomes important, as you move around with it.
It can be done, Im here to tell you. But its hard, Im also here to tell you.
It requires eternal vigilance. And sometimes, your stuff disappears (hopefully nothing important like papers ID and whatnot), and it feels like a blessing.
A great benefit of lightening the load?
You make room for better stuff to come into your life.
Im here to tell ya. :-)
---
And no, we're not just talking about 'stuff'.
From my Morning Marn (tm)
Dear Diary:
I have been feeling melancholy.
Yes, picture a middle-aged woman with the back of her hand dramatically resting on her forehead and you pretty much have my current mood.
Shut up. It's my journal and I'll drama if I want to.
Heh. Yup. She's entitled. :-)
------
It's RAINING
Its called the Pineapple Express around here. Thats when a big woosh of Winter Weather Crap comes directly from the Hawai'ian Islands, mates violently with Alaskan/Bering Sea Weather Systems, and brings floods along the coast.. which causes mudslides and the like from hills burnt bare of foliage from the Autumnal Fires.
Imagine rain that extends in an unbroken line from Canada to Mexico.
Ah yes. Winter in California. Grand Shit.
Keeping Warm and Dry now becomes an effort of heroic proportions.
I kinda like it meself, even though the Romance of It All is long gone.
Ok, marn .. can you beat me on the Dramatic Capitalizations in One Entry? :-)
--------
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